Now that I have resided in Texas for nearly two weeks, I feel I now have ample justification for my judgments of the fine state of Texas (you only need about two weeks to sum up any state, right?) Of course, I am no expert. I jest.
BUT, I have learned a few things about Texas that I would love to share with ya all out there who just might be fixin’ to wander out this here way for a hankerin’ for some fine BBQ and some good ol’ home hospitality. (Holy crap, Texas is rubbing off on me . . . I need to get back to Utah where we don’t say out “T’s” . . . such as moun’ain and the city of Lay’on. For the longest time, I thought my maiden name should sound like Hel’on. It’s actually Helton. I saw the T; I just never said it).
Anyway, back to Texas.
The first thing I noticed right away, was that there is a big drug problem here in Texas. It’s true. Everyone here is on drugs. I’m not kidding. Let me explain. The reason I know this (for a fact) is that on nearly every corner you will find a Walgreens or CVS pharmacy. Seriously, EVERY corner. There is not a corner lacking one. I would see a CVS pharmacy and think I’m close to my sister-in-law’s house (she lives down the street from one). But I learned quickly, CVS pharmacy’s cannot be used as a landmark. There’s one on Teel Street, Main Street, Preston Road, Legacy Drive, Lebanon Road, and FM Road 423. That is only Frisco. Plano has plenty and so does Arlington and Denton too. Now, I haven’t seen the whole state of Texas, but if you need six CVS pharmacies and three Walgreens in one city—then people in Texas are drug addicts. No doubt.
Second thing I noticed about Texas . . . SUV’s. Everyone has one. No kidding. AND, pray tell, WHY??? Why would anyone need an SUV in Texas? There are no mountains to climb, or 50 inches of snow to drive through like we get back home in Utah. So why so many gas guzzlers? I don’t get it. I would guess they only come in 2-wheel drive here, right? Now, I could see everyone owning a big ol’ truck (because that’s stereotypical and expected) but I see very few of those driving around. Just lots of Texas ladies in SUV’s. Oh, wait . . . doesn't Texas have a lot of oil? Oh, now I get it. Silly me.
Third thing, Texas doesn’t get carried away with being creative in naming their business’. They keep it simple and to the point. I like it. You always know what you’re getting. Take for instance, there is a business I have seen simply called “Donuts." Nothing more. Nothing less. I assume they sell donuts and that’s all. You would walk in and cannot expect “fancy” donuts or “plain” donuts. You can’t walk in and expect anything, just donuts. They can’t fail that way. Also, there is a business called “Bike’s for Bikers." Same principle. Or another “Cute Nails." Now, this one went out on a limb here, because had they simply said “Nails” and nothing more, you couldn’t have any expectations. But since they put the “Cute” in front, then gosh darn it, my nails better be cute. Again, you know exactly what you are getting.
Fourth thing, at least in the Frisco and neighboring cities, everything is new. Everything—the houses, the business’, the schools and churches. All new. There is nothing old here. AND because everything is so new looking, everything looks the same. I’m sorry, Texas, but it does. Homes in similar communities and business’ in similar shopping malls (and don’t forget the CVS pharmacy on the corner). Creative personality—not so much. Cleanliness and posh looking—very. It’s pretty and fresh, and everything is well maintained. They have rules here that homeowners and business’ must follow. They do very well too in following them. In Utah, well, we’re just glad to have ya—do what you want.
Some other things I learned:
--The grass is weird, it’s the kind of grass that back home we try and kill.
--The weather is humid, humid, humid. The shade is still hot and sticky. Humidity is awful. But, I haven’t had to use lotion the whole time I have been here. I also gave up curling my hair. It’s a wasted effort.
--The water tastes funny and my kids keep asking why “Is this water cleaned? They don’t pump it right from the lake, do they?”
--There are even more nail salons than there are pharmacies. Three times the number, in fact.
But I think the biggest thing I have noticed and learned, people are very friendly here. Neighbors are kind. Communities are kind. People are helpful. It’s a good place. We have had a blast while here.
Thank you Texas for having us.