Yep, fill out the certificate and nail it to my wall. I am officially the “Worst Mother Out There.” I have had my moments of horribleness—normally they are spread out over time with a period of forgiveness separating them. But as of lately, they are coming closer and closer together. Such as forgetting to pick up my daughter from tumbling and showing up an hour later to do so (I apologized profusely to the tumbling coach, hugged and kissed my daughter all day, and assured her that yes, I really do love you! I told her that next time I would forget one of her brothers instead); forgetting about “Family Skate Night” that I am in charge of for the PTA; or dressing my children for school in spring attire (the morning looked great) only to have it completely snow on them while they wait outside for carpool.
But I think my best of the worst moments came last night (though my children are not complaining one bit) . . . I was writing on my new novel, I was at a critical point in which the tension was so fierce that my heart was pumping insanely and my jaw hurt from clenching it so tight. But I feared that if I walked away, set it down, for even a second, I would lose that feeling and not get it back to see that section through. Writers out there understand me, their nodding. Nonwriters are shaking their head in disbelief . . . “You’re rotten!” they say, and in a nonwriting world, they are justifiably correct.
At 7:15pm, I took my two youngest and headed to a “Family Night Scout Event” for my oldest son. It was really nice—slide show, presentations, etc . . . The part my children loved best—the build your own banana splits. It was at this point I realized . . . I had not fed my children dinner. It was 8:00pm.
So what did my children have for dinner? A big, gooey banana split. They each had two. Okay, condemn me. Everybody grab a rock and throw it. I know. I know!
But lets think about this for a minute: Banana's and cherries=fruit; Icecream=dairy; Chopped nuts=legumes; Whipped cream & Marshmallow Topping=isn't it made from egg whites? If so, then they got a little poultry. If not, then a little more dairy; chocolate, carmel, strawberry syrup= fats, oils, and sweets group (the top of the pyramid)
That's at least four out of the six main food groups—they don't even get that when I really cook dinner. So, in essence, I’m I really all that bad?
I will be better. I will. Starting now—wait? What time is it? 8:26am . . . SHOOT! I got to get the kids up for school!
4/29/2010 07:48:11 am
Whoops! Nuts aren't legumes, their under the protien section. Please forgive.
4/30/2010 08:39:49 am
I remember watching Bill Cosby talk about feeding his kids chocolate cake for breakfast. He had the same justification as you did and listed all the ingredients, eggs, milk etc., except his children sang him praises, "Daddy's great, feeds me chocolate cake". :)
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