If I couldn't be a writer, I'd be a roller derby girl. Yes, yes I would.

Being a writer is tough business. Lots of ups, but many, many more downs. Lot's of bruised souls and egos. It's a roller coaster ride that is terrifying and glorious all at once. AND, to be a writer, don't forget, you have to be a pretty tough chick (or dude) to kill off your babies and handle repeated rejections. No wimps allowed here. Uh-uh.

Writers don't bleed red; we bleed ink. That's right, baby. Black ink, and we love it. Bring it on! Watch my fingers fly over the keyboard. Witness my callus' form on the pads of my fingers. *knuckle crunch*

That's why, because of my skills as a writer, I think I could be one totally push-em-down, skate around the rink, awesome roller derby girl.

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(That could be me. Right there --->)

You might laugh and mock my desire to be a tough roller derby girl (you better not, though. I'll push you down and roll right over you with my skates), but think about it. I'm trained for it--mentally.

(Physically is another issue that we will not discuss at this time).

I can handle taunts. I can handle a punch or a clothesline arm to the throat--I'm a writer. I put myself out there every day and have a whole lot of rejections under my belt, thickening my skin. I'm becoming tougher and tougher every day, and all the better writer for it, too. My writing is stronger. Better.

I could totally kick some trash.

I write under a pen name, so of course I'd have to have a cool derby girl name like: "Hardly an Angel" or "AuTOPsy." I also found a derby name generator site and it said my derby name is, "Amelia the Cattleprod." Not sure about that, but okay. I'd be a blocker who blocks other derby chicks from passing by, and clearing a path for our team jammer to fly by and score points.

Wanna know how I know so much about this sport? First, I watched the movie Whip it (makes me an expert, I know). Second, I read about it in a SLC newspaper a while back--Yes, Utah has cools stuff like roller derby teams. And third, I'm planning to go see a real live roller derby competition this Saturday. Super cool. I'm pumped.

Now all I need is a pair of roller skates, so I can practice my moves. It should come back to me like riding a bike, right?

Okay, what about you? If you couldn't be a writer, but could use your writerly skills to be or do something else, what would you choose to do?

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